Day 62/63 - Wipe up

So the end of my fellowship was finally upon us. This meant several things - 1) I was now legit going into the real world. I had a job and had to begin transitioning into a real person. But 2) It meant my time with bathroomie was finally coming to an end.

But in true Bathroomie style you know the end of our relationship wasn't just going to fizzle out. If it was ending, it was ending with a bang.

It's the last night so obviously we were going out and drinking heavily. I had gone out to buy liquor and was coming back to my room before I got all dolled up and became the lush you all know and love.

I walk into my room and my roommate is on my bed, with her laptop, EATING RAMEN.

ON MY BED.

She was EATING.

RAMEN.

ON MY BED.

Since it's the last day I'm feeling a little gutsy so I go:
"Roomie, what are you doing?"

"Girl, you know the Internet doesn't work on my side."

"I mean I get that. But like, it doesn't mean you can just lounge on my side."

"Ok. Alright. Chill out."

And with that she got up and went back to her side.

"You goin' out tonight?" She asked me.

"Yeah, a bunch of us are. You coming?"

"Girl, I dunno. I'm not really good with goodbyes."

"Well I mean, tonight's more of a celebration, tomorrow we'll worry about goodbyes."

"Nah, girl, I have work to do."

I said that was fine, but that I needed to get ready. I mean I guess it's kind of endearing that she was going to be sad to say bye to all of us. But then I went into the bathroom to shower.

- No toilet paper
- Panties hanging on the door (hanging over / TOUCHING MY TOWEL)
- A HUGE ball of hair clogging the drain
- And a strange horrible smell permeating from the bowl.

She never did disappoint.

I showered and got ready. Uneventful. She just remained on her computer on the bed. No further incidences.

I made my drink and said bye, and that I would see her later.

I left, but a few minutes later I realized I had forgotten my cell phone.

I went back into my room and sure enough there she was, on my side, except instead of sitting on my bed she was scrubbing it with a sponge.

Yup. She had spilt some of her Ramen on my bed.

"Sorry girl, I slipped."

Shocked, I grabbed my cell phone off the kitchen counter where I left it.

"Roomie," I said, "I'm sorry, but that's not ok. Please don't hang out on my side of the room."

"Well I need the Internet" was her reply.

"Whatever." And I walked out.

Part of me hoped that would be the last thing I ever needed to say to her. But it wasn't. The next morning she was still there when I awoke. We didn't really speak. Her train was leaving before I was so she left first.

"Well," she said, "It's been real."

"It's definitely been something." I responded.

And then, out of no where, she gives me this HUGE hug. And says, "Good luck with everything."

I told her the same.

She sighed and said, "Shit, now how am I going to get all this stuff downstairs by myself." Referring to her copious amounts of luggage.

My father who was there helping me pack up told her not to worry, he'd help her out. To which she responded with "Thanks!" And then grabbed her backpack, leaving my poor father to carry her two huge suitcases. He told me it was the most awkward elevator ride he's ever experienced.

He didn't care to elaborate.

And to think, after the hug I almost felt bad for the blog. But I mean it's one thing to fuck with me. It's another thing to fuck with my daddy.

And then she was out of my life...


...or so I thought.

Stay tuned for more, because it's coming.